h.e.l.l

dunno what to say

dunno what to do

the same thing happen again and again

and it hurts me badly...

life accompany by tears..

nobody cares

but i still here

waiting for u to comfort me

even though i know u could'nt

sorry for disturbing ur life

i'm lost in transactions

i dunno where to start

to begin a new life

because now i'm hurt

i dun have any encouragement at all

why i couldn't let go

this kind of feeling

should i leave, stay or dead??

let by gone be bygone

it hurts when we risk our heart &

it ends up being broken..

but what hurts more is

when we still hold on

when we already know

we're waiting for nothing

unisel s.a

wow day 4 in shah alam..at last dpt gak update blog..just a story about my new life in this new sem at unisel shah alam..nothing much..but a new environment to study,, to habiskan sisa2 hidupku sbgai student disini..insyaallah..mls nk cte byk..just take a look at the pics la..
hope for the best...

enuff

ok dib enuff eh..
stop thinking that u can't
stop thinking that u are down
u have to get up
and go against it..
if u just sit down
and thinking about this and that
u won't go away
u have to be strong
and love yourself
no matter what
life must goes on
n u r the one who can change it.....

cinta tak harus memiliki

Cinta memang tak selamanya bisa indah
Cinta juga bisa berubah menjadi sakit
Begitu yang ku rasakan kini
Perih hatiku tinggal kehancuran

Tak pernah terbayangkan
Dan tak pernah terfikirkan
Cintamu dan cintaku akan berpisah
Namun harus ku relakan itu
Untuk hidupmu agar lebih baik

Maafkan aku setulus hatimu
Kepergian diriku itu bukan keinginanku
Terima saja dengan pilihan yang lain
Dari orang tuamu

Jangan bersedih dengan keadaan ini
Jika kamu menangis aku juga ikut menangis
Terima saja semua ini ku lakukan
Untukmu…

Sayang semua ini ku lakukan
Hanya demi kebaikan kamu
Meski semua ini
Itu menyakitkanku

Maafkan aku setulus hatimu
Kepergian diriku itu bukan keinginanku
Terima saja dengan pilihan yang lain
Dari orang tuamu

Jangan bersedih dengan keadaan ini
Jika kamu menangis aku juga ikut menangis
Terima saja semua ini ku lakukan
Demi kebaikanmu

Jangan bersedih dengan keadaan ini
Jika kamu menangis aku juga ikut menangis
Terima saja semua ini ku lakukan
Terima saja semua ini ku lakukan
Untukmu…

l.o.s.t

oh tuhan, sy btol2 xde semangat nak blek u
nak berjuang untuk sem yg terakhir..
aduss ..ape nak jadi ni...
i've lost my spirit...
no inspiration to study
blom pe2 i've lost my focus
wake up dib
u should move on
i really need a spirit
a motivation to keep holding on
to strive for excellence
but i dun know..
there is sumthing behind it
that resist me..
can u please go away from me
let me live happily

bley tak sy nak tros2 an senyum mcm ni



mcm ni



& macam ni...


kenapa setiap kali sy hampir tersenyum..mesti ade air mata yg menemani..huhuhu
can sumbody swept the tears away from me

cinta begini

k.o.r.b.a.n

jika seseorang itu hadir dalam hidup saya dan menjadi sebahagian drpd sy..tp atas sebab2 tertentu die harus pergi tinggalkan saya,jangan terlalu sedih terima lah kenyataan itu sekurang kurangnya die pernah membahagiakan sy dan sy redha dengan ketentuan Allah

tbe2 terkelu bile dgr dialog tu drp filem syurga cinta....yup aku redha ngn ketentuan ak..bru skrg aku tau apekah sebab berlakunya semue tu..everything happen for the reason kn..memang kenyataan tu kdg2 perit untuk kita tanggung, mmg sedih untuk kite terima
tp bile kite tau cte sebenar..insyaallah kite akan dpt menerimanya dgan hati yg terbuka

kdg2 kite perlu korbankan perasaan kita untuk org yg kita sayang..mencintai tak semstinya untuk dimiliki..tp kite akan tumpang bahagia bile kita melihat org yg kite syang bahagia dengan org yg dicintainya....pengorbanan memupuk nilai kesabaran, kesabaran mencetuskan kebahagiaan...insyaallah..ade hikmah di sebalik sme ni
sy cume mampu berusaha dan bertawakkal..
smoga ape yg sy lakukan akan mendapat keredhaannya..
sy cume berharap agar sy kuat dan tabah untuk melaluinya...

makan ati

ape tu makan ati??

huhu...

hati yg pedih terhiris..sangat sakit dan pedih

bile kebenaran terungkap

hati terus berdarah luka dan berderai..

wahh sangat tragis kan..

bile hati tu bru jek nak bek

bru jek nk tampal plaster

ade jek yg datang koyakkan plaster tu

dan

dan bile dh kuat untuk hadapi esok
kenapa ade jek yg dtg merungkai masa silam
dan sejarah itu lah yg menghancurkan hati ini
sakit , pedih, lesu dan mati..
kalo sblm ni jiwe aku separuh mati..
skrg jiwe dh xde lagi...
ak x slahkan sesiapa
kerana ku yg bdoh
kerana x mampu untuk
ubati hatiku
dan tros2 an bgnyer terluke
sory hati..
sy tros trosan bg awk sakit
sy langsung xjge awk
sy tros bg awk hrapan
tp sbnrnyer
harapan tu lah yg memusnahkan awk
sbb harapan tu dh xde
dh pergi dan mati...
sy dh x larat untuk sme ni..
kekuatan dah dimusnahkan
bile kite dikhianati
dan pengorbanan slame ni hanya sia2..
terima kasih untuk segalanya..
selamat hari raya qurban
awk dh qurban kan ati sy

laksa johor

memandangkan ari ni sangat rajin untuk memasak dan sebenarnya teringin nak makan laksa johor..nak beli kat kedai x sme loh ngn buat sendiri..so sy ngaan rajinnye..menuntut ilmu dengan mak saya untuk masak laksa johor..n yess saya pass untuknye..hhehhe

walaupun nak buat laksa ni agak rumit and memerlukan kesabaran yg tinggi..hehe sbb die need time untuk wat die..

huhu so gedik la kan nk share recipe tu kat blog ni..

untuk buat kuah laksa johor

bahan A

15 lada kering, 3 biji bwg besar, 3 ulas bwg puteh, sikit halia, lengkuas, 3 batang serai dan sedikit kunyit..bahan2 ni kita blend

bahan b

ikan parang dicuci diperap ngn halia n bwg puteh cket kite rebus, toskan dan kite siang ... amek isinya sahaja..jangan ngn tulang2 msuk..hehe lepastu kite blend kan.klo nk sdp kite gune air yg kite rebus ikan td kedlm blender skali..so kire mcm stok ikan la..blend kan juga udang kering, 15 ekor udang dan 4 biji buah keras...

bahan2 lain

kari ikan, kerisik, asam keping dan santan, garam n gula secukup rasa

so puan2,,haha bile bahan2 ni dah siap..kite dh bley tumis ye..

mule2 panaskan minyak, n tumiskan bwg merah n bwg puteh cket untuk nak wangikan dan sdpkan rse..pastu kite msukkan bahan2 A..oh ye untuk nak msak kuah ni..kite kene gune slow fire bru sdp n bahan2 x hangus...agak2 sambal tu dh dh masak cket...masukkan dalam 3 sudu besar kari ikan..then kite kacau lagi..bile agak2 dh kering masukkan plak bahan b..klo pekat sgt tambahkan air sikit...pastu agak2 dh sebati kite masukkan santan..dlm satu setengah paket la..then kite kacau lagi..pastu agak2 die dh pecah minyak masukkan pulak kerisik..td beli jek yg dh ciap so td letak dalam due paket kecik kerisik..kacau lagi smp die sebati..kite masukkan la garam, gula dan asam keping 2 . then kite biarkan jek die smp mendidih dan naik bau..smp die pecah minyak..biarkan jek ngn api slow smp die btol2 masak..biar lme cket so kuah tu sebati dan tahan lama ..then siap

next step, yelah spagethi..rebuskan jek lah spagethi tu..masukkan dlm air mendidih..letakkan cket minyak msak supaya die x melekat..

then untuk topping laksa johor ni, kite perlukan, timun, bwg jepun, limau kasturi,daun selasih, daun kesum,tauge n sambal belacan..

sambal belacan ni tumbuk lagi kau lah kan...

Day 1 — favorite song

Too many songs to list out, i am the music lover sme genre bley msuk lah..except dangdut..sy benci dangdut ok.....hehe..suke dgr music ikut mood..so

bile sedih or hurt lagu yg ske dgr ialah

• usah lepaskan-taufik batisah
• bila cinta-gio
• hati yang kau sakiti-rossa
• sepi sekuntum mawar merah-ella
• kebahagiaan dalam perpisahan-syahir
• when your gone-avril
• because of u-kelly clarkson
• love the way u lie-rihanna feat eminem
• cinta begini-tangga
• akhir cerita cinta-glenn fredly
• matahariku-agnes monica
• i'm sorry goodbye-kris dayanti
• mahligai dr air mataku-lestary
• separuh jiwaku pergi-anang
• berdiri seorang perindu-ibnor riza

and byk lagu yg tangkap leleh sedih2..well biase lah pendengar setia segmen suria cinta..biasalah aunty sy dj linn tu..haha

whenever i down and out..rse mcm nak give up jek ngn life i love to listen

• holding on-taufik batisah
• mendua-hampir ke situ
• zikir munajat
• insyaallah-maher zain
• keluarga bahagia-saujana
• bacaan yassin
• perfect-

old skool/ all time favourite song

• hero and my all-mariah carey
• westlife songs
• anuar zain songs
• so sick-neyo
• Leaving On A Jet Plane-Chantal Kreviazuk
• belaian jiwa-innuendo
• isabella-search
• kau ilhamku-manbai
• some lagu2 hindustan..hehe

lagu2 baru skrg byk merepek cket..tp

skrg ngah gile lagu

• 150 juta-fynn jamal
• kimia-melda ahmad
• hanyut-faizal tahir
• disaat aku mencintaimu-dadali
• aku atau die-nubhan
• bukan untukmu-kat mentor

and antara artist yg xpnah dissapointed me with their song ialah taufik batisah, ungu , wali band, anuar zain, faizal tahir, aizat , hafiz af7,rossa, melly goeslow and maher zain..lagu2 mereka memang superbbb ....itu sme cume sbahagian drp tu la..penuh lah page nak sumbat sme kan..hehhe

challenges

Day 1 — Your favorite song
Day 2 — Your favorite movie
Day 3 – Your idea of the perfect first date.
Day 4 – Your favorite photograph of your best friend.
Day 5 – How important you think education is?
Day 6 – A photo of an animal you’d love to keep as a pet.
Day 7 – Your dream wedding.
Day 8 – A song to match your mood.
Day 9 – A photo of the item you last purchased.
Day 10 – A photo of our favorite place to eat.
Day 11 – What’s in your makeup bag?
Day 12 – Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is.
Day 13 – Your views on drugs and alcohol
Day 14 – A TV show you’re currently addicted to.
Day 15 – Something you don’t leave the house without.
Day 16 – Your view on homosexuality.
Day 17 – How you hope your future will be like.
Day 18 – 5 things that irritate ME about opposite/same sex
Day 19 – Your reflection in the mirror
Day 20 – The meaning behind your blog name.
Day 21 – A photo of something that makes you happy.
Day 22 – A letter to someone who has hurt you recently.
Day 23 – 15 facts about you.
Day 24 – A photo of something that means a lot to you.
Day 25 – Who are you?
Day 26 – A photo of somewhere you want to go.
Day 27 – What kind of person attracts you?
Day 28 – In this past month, what have you learned?
Day 29 – Something you could never get tired of doing.
Day 30 – A photograph of yourself today + three good things that have happened in the past 30 days

happy birthday abah

happy 58th birthday to abah today
May life brightest joys
illuminate your path
and may each journey
make your dreams come true..
adik sayang abah..
muahhhhhh

so this year no present..hehe
tp adik blanje abah makan jek yer..
oleh sbab abah nk mkn beriyani
so we went and search for nasi beriyani gham kat Nina's restaurant
tp sayangnyer kdai tu tutup plak
xtau bile nak bukak coz dh due 3 kali pegi tutup jek
so jalan2 cr makan kat abndar baru uda
jumpe satu briani house
abah restaurant name die
oklah makanan die not bad..sdpp
cume kek jek xde mcm kat nina..
hope you enjoy it



sirap bandung soda

bryani gham..yg xbpe nk gham la

hehe this picture below was taken mse sy berumur satu tahun..comel kan..hehhe
yg penting my abah hensem tu time mude2..huhu

my one year old birthday cake


then this is the latest picture taken mse rye tu..with new born iman rizkie..comel banget deyy

s.y.u.k.u.r

11.11.2010
lucky number..hehe
thankful and grateful..
alhamdulillah
i'm happy today
result dh kuar..
n sangat berpuas ati..
a lot of improvement
ye lah dh due sem i cried when i saw my result
but today i cry happily and gratefully
thank u allah...
even though so many obstacles happen to me..
but at last i manage to score it..
alhamdulillah syukur...
thanx to my abah n mak,family, lecturers and friends..

p/s congrates to others

g.u.g.u.p

huaaaaahh.
sangat2 gugup bile first time bwk keta td..
nervous tkot sme de..
dorg suh buat lain ak wat lain..hahha
klaka seram pon de gak td...
nseb bek x langgar org..org kat tepi2 tu pon tkto gtgk aku bwk keta..
hahah sangat lawak ble tgk muke dorg..
biase la first time kn..
bpe kali mati enjin xyah ckp la
nseb bek x byk student ri ni..klo x malu yg amat..heheh
second time bile blajar parking bukit n tiga penjuru
oklah nampak dh confident cket..cket jek
kat bukit second time jek dh mengagau dh..
ye ah kene tengking jek bis mengelupur
nk cr brek tertekan minyak
hahahha
satu pengalaman yg bru ari ni..
tu lah selame ni tau nk condemn jek cre org bwk keta
ni dib bwk keta..amek kau..hahah
but ok lah kan..mule2 memang lah susah
isnyaallah nti bley..
hope everything will be ok..

x bis nervous pasal keta
nervous lak bout exam result
dgr cte 12 mlm ni dh bley check
sgt2 takot k..
sy xmau down lagi..nk better dis sem
hopefully can get better improvement
xmu lah turun lagi..
plz2 result..hope sgt

ptg td, my parcel dh smp..thanx ayunar
sangat cepat dan mudah
n sangat berpuas ati ngn warna n kualiti produk
keep it up gurls.
so sementare xtau nk wat pe
nk tdo pon xley sbb nervous system x berjalan dgn lancar
so try2 lah inner two tone ngn ayunar dgn pelbagai mcm style..
sikit jek try
xlarat dh..

f.a.i.l

gagal yeah i such a failure..
fail to stop the tears
fail to make myself happy
fail to erase all the pain
fail to let myself stop thinking bout him
no matter how hard i try..
yeah i'm hurt
totally..
instead nobody knows i still drop into tears every time i wake up and close my eyes..
i dun ask for anything..
i just hope i can get over it...
and i wish to be a stronger person

p/s: smlm i watched ponti anak remaja yg shooting kat unisel bj tu..
n i remember one of the pontianak tu ckp yg die ade kuase untuk luputkan ingatan pada seseorg...kan best kalo diri kite de butang delete untuk erase some of the memories...ermm it just a fiction...

l.o.v.e

i fall in love with this song..sangat sedih..it reminds me of him..huhu

s.a.d

Sometimes you love something so much that it hurts to leave it, but you must.
Sometimes it hurts too much to hold on to that thing you love.
And sometimes you let go of what you love because it hurts,

Why do people have to lose things to find out what they really mean?
yeah and i lose it..and what can i do just to watch u leave..

When you said forever, you meant a few months.
When I said forever, I meant every day until I died.
When you said always, you meant until you couldn't handle it anymore.
When I said always, I meant until time ended.
When you said you loved me, you meant I was no different from any other girl.
When I said I loved you, I meant I had never felt what I felt for you.

I wish I had the guts to walk away and forget about what we had. But, I can’t because I know you won't come after me, and I guess that's what hurts the most.

It hurts to see you walk away. For admit it or not, you were an important part of my life and the time we shared will forever be a part of me. So even though I realize that it was never meant to be, still, it hurts.

The ones that you love the most are usually the ones that hurt you the most

dilema

ketika malam penuh bintang
di antara cahya temaram
kau beri aku kesejukan
tapi hatiku bimbang

kau tanya apakah ku bisa
membuka hatiku untukmu
ku tak bisa berkata kata
airmata yang bicara

sesungguhnya ku ingin dirimu
tuk cairkan hatiku yang beku
tapi aku belum siap
aku jadi dilema

aku tak mau menyakitimu
karna hati ini masih ragu
tapi aku butuh cinta
aku jadi dilema

aku ingin tapi ku tak bisa
apakah ini nyata atau mimpi belaka
ku takut rindu bila tak lagi bertemu
haruskah ku terima cinta yang dilema



p/s: saya x mau lukai ati awk
sbb sy tau ati sy masih ade die

move on

hello peeps..
semester break was good..
i was busy taking my driving license..huhu
skrg bru sibuk nak amek
yelah..after this next semester busy with industrial training and insyaallah will step up to working environment...sng la cket kalo de transport sendiri and that's why kene amek license skrg...huhu


talking bout my last exam..moderate la..business research was really killing me and yg lain pon bley tahan gak soklan die..just do my best and really hope for the best result....and that was last sem study kat unisel bestary jaya..yeah honestly i will miss every moment there..even though i used to hate that place tp kat ctu tersemat segala kenangan manis n pahit..experience to be a better person..huhu really n i gonna miss that..see u again during convocation..insyaallah kalo panjang umur murah rezeki..i'll be there...



last day exam


this picture was taken after the last paper 'compensation'

and after that ..merdeka..pergi meronggeng with my friends kat sunway...
karoeke, makan2, n release tension..hehe






karaoke di kotak merah



steamboat


flaming steamboat


with my kak ros


shopping....sempat algi tuu



and to unisel shah alam, really hope will be a better place for me to get a new life there...4 month jek spent time kat ctu..hope dipermudahkan segala urusan ku nanti..insyaallah...




my rent house kat sne..huhu