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Saturday, June 26, 2010

ku berserah

Hembusan...
Angin dingin membelai jiwaku...
Bergelora perasaan pabila kau menjauhkan diri dari ku...
Seolah cinta suciku tak bermakna lagi untuk dirimu...
Apakah... maksudnya semua ini...

Mungkinkah adanya kesilapan dariku...
Yang tak pernah ku duga...
Maafkanlah oh sayangku
Oh percayalah... ku tak bermaksud begitu
Jangan tinggal daku...
Keseorangan...

Ku berserah
Kepadamu Maha Esa
Mungkin takdir
Telah menentukan segalanya
Ku berserah
Kepada apa yang telah berlaku pada diriku ini
Hanya dikau
Dapat merubah segalanya
Pada dikau saja
Ku mengharap
Moga kau kembali
Berikanlah kasih
Nyalakanlah lilin cinta... kita...

Ku pohon kan kemaafan dengan ikhlas hatiku
Ku tak rela dipisahkan
Walaupun sementara
Sambutlah tangan ku ini
Genggami seeratnya
Namun kini...
Semuanya ku berserah...

Ku berserah
Kepadamu Maha Esa
Mungkin takdir
Telah menentukan segalanya
Ku berserah
Kepada apa yang telah berlaku pada diriku ini
Hanya dikau
Dapat merubah segalanya
Pada dikau saja
Ku mengharap
Moga kau kembali
Berikanlah kasih
Nyalakanlah lilin cinta... kita...

Friday, June 25, 2010

t.e.a.r.s

i can't sleep last night...and i failed to stop the tears...sorry
best friends can turn to be a lover but lover cant turn to be a friends

Thursday, June 24, 2010

alhamdulillah

kembali tenang...maybe ade hikmah di sebalik semua ini..hope will be better soon..

journey

i'm going back to unisel now work to do....early than usual..got sumthing to do..
hope everything will be better.. i need to make myself busy rather to cry everyday, i have to be strong... i just do not want to repeat my oldest mistakes.. emm i dun want what had happened in matrix happen to me again..i have to bestrong..hope everything will better soon..do not want to do anything...juz leave it to god for everything...

pray for my journey everyone..

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

s.a.k.i.t

hatiku sakit, perih , pedih , menanah... terasa diri ini tak bernilai..syok sendiri...
nangis, kali ini bukan dr mata tp di hati..xde sape yg tau melainkan diri sendiri yang menahan sakit dihati..xpe lah ..naseb badan

ape salah aku sampai ko wat mcm ni..besar sgt ke salah aku..huh smp ko hukum aku mcm ni..hati aku sakit, skt sgt hanya tuhan jek tau..kdg2 smp org len yg jadi mangsa bile aku lepaskan kemarahan aku pada org len...
x bley ke kalo kite bahagia mcm dulu..xde lah rase tersisih mcm ni..kate org kalo kite syg org tu xde rahsia, sme masalah kite kongsi same. ni x..masalah ko masalah ko, masalah aku masalah aku. susah sorg2 sng sorg2 ..pe kes?? kalo dh x ske ckp lah..jgn wat aku mcm ni ley x..aku rase terseksa mcm ni.. tiap2 hari hati aku sakit..mcm ne aku nak msuk sem bru kalo skrg kat umah pon tetiap ari aku nangis... nape?? kalo aku salah aku mintak maaf..bg lah peluang aku berubah..sme org wat salah.,... aku tau aku x mcm org len, aku degil , ikot pale aku, tp x sme bende yang aku x ikot ckp ko kan..

ya allah , tolong lah hanya padamu aku berserah...kau hapuskanlah air mate ini... berikan lah aku kekuatan...aku x tahan hidup mcm ni,, setiap ari ati aku sakit menangis..takde sape yg paham ya allah..

i'll keep praying for things to be better and better..insyaallah

Tuhan tolong nyatakanlah
Padanya tentang cinta
Adakah masih diriku di perlukan

Tuhan tunjukkan padanya
Tentang apa yang ku fikirkan
Adakah cinta ini
Perlu untuk dirinya

Berbicara tentang cinta kita
Masih tiada noktah penghujungnya
Berbicara tentang perasaan
Simpan saja semua itu

Mengapa kau masih
Mencari kepastian dalam cinta
Dan disini masih
Menanti jawapannya

yang terindah

Semenjak kau hadir dalam hidupku
Tiada lagi keresahan
Kau mengetuk pintu hatiku
Tanpa sedar hingga ku izinkan

Kau yang bernama cinta
Kau yang memberi rasa
Kau yang ilhamkan bahagia
Hingga aku terasa indah

Maaf jikaku tidak sempurna
Tika bahagia mula menjelma
Bila keyakinan datang merasa
Kasih disalut dengan kejujuran

Mencintai dirimu
Merindui dirimu
Memiliki dirimu
Hingga akhir hayat bersama kamu

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

ya allah

ya allah, aku memohon kepada Mu agar kau berikan kekuatan untuk aku menghadapi dugaanmu. berikanlah aku ketenangan dan hapuskanlah air mata ini . ya allah..sesungguhnya hanya padamu aku berserah..

Monday, June 21, 2010

m.i.s.s

i am tired mentally and physically

i wish that i could turn back time to, so that i would not make a mistakes... sorry i'm not perfect, not good enough for u,,not a ordinary gurl that u have known before.. but i am just an ordinary gurl who love u damn much..no words can describe how much i love u... i dun know what else i can do to attract u anymore.. our relationship is getting dull..and i realised it we are not like before..


i'm not hoping for anything right now..let bygone be bygone.. i just want to thank u for always be with me in everything i do, u r the one who i can tallk almost everything with u, u always be a good listener...u cared like my dad, protect like my bro and loved me as the lover...u r never be replaced..even though i'm da stuborn person i know u always be patient on me..even though now u getting bored and fed up to me.. but u r always there for me... i miss u dear..always count the days to meet u..crying everyday because being guilty for not being a good enuff for u..i want u to make me listen for u, even though i'm protest it but deep inside i will listen to you..it just that a reaction towards it..

from now on, i just leave it to u.. i just do da best..i will not do anything..sumtimes..silent will be da best way for evrything..i will be a new person ... maybe more quiet and follow everything that have been stated for me....live the life into the fullest..

sayer cume mau happy!!!

this becoming new sem, saye cume mau gembira n bahagia..no more tears, sadness and tenses... saya ingin menjadi budak yang baik yang boleh membanggakan kedua ibu bapa saya dan diri saya sendiri..saya ingin menjadi pelajar yang baik..jadi sebelum itu, saya ingin meminta maaf kepada sesiapa yang pernah saya lukai.... saya hanya mau jadi yang terbaik dengan hati yang gembira dan mendapat keputusan yang terbaik..
wish me luck...
saya rasa bersemangat untuk mulakan sem baru ini dengan jayanya...

hahhaha...

Sunday, June 20, 2010

f.e.e.l.i.n.g

Spiteful words can hurt your feelings but silence breaks your heart.


Two things scare me. The first is getting hurt. But that's not nearly as scary as the second, which is losing.


With love, you should go ahead and take the risk of getting hurt... because love is an amazing feeling.


This is a tough game. There are times when you've got to play hurt, when you've got to block out the pain.


Berulang kali kumencuba
Memujuk hati
Lupakan semua
Kenangan...

Namun mimpi bertemu lagi
Di saat engkau
Tiada di sisi...

Ku berpegang pada janji
Tercipta ... antara kita dulu
Hilangmu tiada berganti
Biarlah ... begini

Ku belayar di lautan
Tidak bertepian
Sesekali disedarkan
Ombak yang mendatang
Aku seperti hilang
Punca arah dan ... tujuan

Aku puisikan namamu
Bersama rindu
Di dalam sendu ...

Friday, June 18, 2010

returns




What do you do when your feelings are mixed up inside you
You try to be happy but inside your always blue
At times you'd like to cry but there's people all about
So you hold it back and try not to pout
You try not to think of the bad times you had
And try to be happy but inside your always sad
You know exactly what you really want to say
But you can never get it out to this very day
It runs about in your head both day and night
And it doesn't go away no matter how hard you fight
People ask "How are you" you say "good" what a lie
If they only knew you would really rather cry
No matter what you do it is always on your mind
And all the people around you are so happy and kind
You try everything but nothing seems to work
All that pain because of one little hurt
No one understands what your going thru now
You want to live a happy life but you don't know how.


♥If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it was, and always will be yours. If it never returns, it was never yours to begin with.

turn over a new leaf

Kekasih Yang Tak Di Anggap

aku mentari tapi tak menghangatkanmu
aku pelangi tak memberi warna di hidupmu
aku sang bulan tak menerangi malammu
aku lah bintang yg hilang ditelan kegelapan
selalu itu yg kau ucapkan padaku


sebagai kekasih yg tak dianggap
aku hanya bisa mencoba mengalah
menahan setiap amarah
aku sang bulan tak menerangi malammu
aku lah bintang yg hilang ditelan kegelapan


sebagai kekasih yg tak dianggap
aku hanya bisa mencoba bersabar
ku yakin kau kan berubah




yeah..from now on, i promise to myself..to change my self to be a better person, to gain a better life... i will do what i think the best for me..to be a stronger person, lovely and be a better life with my family, friends and the loved ones...
i just need a space in my life, a time for myself..to recover who i am...


Thursday, June 17, 2010

s.w.e.e.t 21

my dream:
1. hope that u will be de first person who call me and wish me..
2.hope to talk to u through the phone all along the night enjoy the free credit
3. perhaps u will send me a birthday card.
i dun hope for any grand..jus a simple but sweet

but we do not always get what we want and things turn to this
1. u become de 27th person who wish my bday
2. i waiting for u all the night but after u call me then suddenly u sleep early. then 4.25 am u call me after i'm tired of waiting and moody...
3.no birthday card at all but had a big arguement

this is my first time to celebrate my 21st bday,,,but that's all..huhuu
so moral of the sorry

do not overly excited about something as it will end up with frustration


like this!!!







but then my parents and I went to pizza hut to had some pizza and thanx to my bro coz sponsoring me a slice of cake..really appreciate it..at least sumthing to chill me up...


happy 21st




happy 21st birthday to me... yeah i am now 21
no more teens babe..haha should be more matured now..huhu i guess..
no celebration ..just hanging out with my parents coz i 'm craving for that cake..hehehhe..so only my parents that i can hope for..huhu

wishes- be a successful person in the world
- no more tears, i just want happiness
- happy and healthy family
- study is my priority
- become a stronger woman..




p/s: just want to share my feelings right now..hurt

Kosong hidupku tanpa mu
Cermin ku membayangkan bayanganmu
Pameran kaseh ku layu
Tiada dirimu tiada untukku
Tinggalkanku dalam anganku
Sakitku mencintaimu
Deritaku merinduimu
Lemah hati menginginkanmu
Hancur hatiku
Berkeping-keping jadinya
Hilangku bukan kerana cinta
Hilangku bukan untuk menyeksa
Bagiku semua tiada berharga
Biarku telan semua derita

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

childhood memories

suddenly i found my album, childhood moments..huhu


one year old birthday party


with my family



2 years old


3 years old celebration



wah, i wish i could turn back to childhood moment..the day when the whole family gather to celbrate bday,collect as many presents as i can..heheheh.really miss this moment....

y.o.u




can i have u as my bday present???
i just want u to spent ur time with me...eating chocolate walnut cake together..watching romantic movies and eating ice cream..i dun want any luxury but i just want u..ur love.....

Thursday, June 10, 2010

♥ hurt ♥


why do they always hurt the ones they love?

i dun know, frankly speaking..i'm hurt..i know it just a small matter but i've keep inside my heart .. and now then i told u everything what i feel..why i always never be appreciated..i dont ask for something grand but just a bit acknowledgement..thats all..maybe u are just taking for granted or i'm the one who too excited for that but is it wrong when we remembered the special date for only once a month..is it hard just to remembered..i dun ask anything..but if u think..i'm not matured just to make this as a big thing to argue..then its up to u..i will not do anything after this..is that what u want..then i will follow..we dont have to remember all those thing just let it gone..thank u

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

frustrated

i just got my exam result..and one word to describe it is frustration..seriously..i burnt into tears when i checked my result..it is really disappointed...no a at all.and it was worst then last sem..maybe i put too high expectation for my result and this is what i get..i need a time to recover..
next sem-no more plays, no more entertainment.study study and study

Monday, June 7, 2010

bila cinta

Bila cinta kini
Tak lagi bermakna
Yang ku rasa kini
Hanyalah nestapa

Dulu kau tawarkan
Manisnya janjimu
Yang ku sambut itu
Dengan segenap hatiku


Hilangnya cintamu
Menusuk hatiku
Ternyata memilih
Cinta yang fana


Hingga ku terjatuh
Dalam harapan


this is what i feel right now..i dun know..i lost in transaction..i dun know where is the love...i feel that i'm the only one who feel it but the other person seems doesn't care..i dun know..its really hurt when u can't scream it out loud but the only things that u can do is just keep inside ur heart and cry it in your heart..only u will feel it the pain..heart break...this is what i feel right now i may not be perfect but i'm always me..and i can't change my self just to make u happy..i'm sorry..i dun want to tell u but i dun feel the love from u..if i can only turn back time and erase all the pain...

Sunday, June 6, 2010

heart ache

i don't know what happen to my self lately..i feel there is sumthing wrong sumwhere..i dun know..i dont really feel good lately..headache, migraine, stomach ache, and it was more pain when there is heart ache..i dun want any attention from u..but it seems that u dont really care about me any more..betul kate mak , lelaki bile nk pikat caring bgai nk rak, anta pegi klinik sme tp lepas dh dapat habuk..dimarah nye lagi ade...huhu
sumtimes when gurl tell u that they are sick...they du not want anything actually..just show to them that u care like u love them..not to be scolded..they do not act that they are sick, just to get an attention..but they do really sick...they do not tell anyone because they think they have their bf to tell so to comfort them..but oppositely her bf was the one who make the heart ache and feel uncomfortable..huhu
i dun know, from now onwards..i will not telling u if i am sick..let me fell all the pain alone by myself..thank u